Monday, August 4, 2008

"NEW S#!t!" -Ghetto Mysteries Vol.1

Okay folks, here's where we openly talk about things that go on in the "Hood" that we accept and NEVER question...
(except in our heads). Well hush hush no more! Let's air things out shall we? I've collected a short list of my own that often puzzled me but never knew quite WHO to turn to to ask. Maybe you can answer some, and end my sleepless nights Lol.

1. What do we call the corner store a"Bodega" when clearly it's owned by Arabs?

2. What guys wear do-rags if their bald or Hispanic?

3. Why do chicks that wear Baby Phat, Rocawear, Apple Bottoms, etc. want me to believe their Fendi (Gucci, LV) bag is real...huh why?

4. Who started the "Crack head Doorman" trend at fast-food restaurants?

5. Why are you still pushing your child around in a stroller, if he's almost as tall as you?

6. Why do we call each other "Son" except the real one we won't claim? Huh Maury?

7. When will old, fat, non-athletic dudes give up wearing basketball jerseys with a baseball hat (two different sports dude, twoooo different sports)?

8.Why oh why, do you think I want your fat ass squeezing into the two seater I'm seated in on the train?

9. How are they "shorts", if they're an inch above your ankles hmmmm?

10.How is that we can stand in line for "Dark Knight", "Playstation" or "Nike" releases, "iPhone" debutes, etc. But complain if we're in line for more than 15mins to get your OWN paycheck to pay for those things?

3 comments:

Joann BrightnBK said...

I luuuuvvvv your ghetto mysteries! Especially 3,6,8&9. Let me know if you find the answers. LMAO!

Sallomazing! said...

Hi-fuckin-larious!!!!!! I'm going to repeat these at Rock The Block! lmao

Renee said...

oh Al, you are too on point! #3- thank you!f what you wearing knock off are the worst(esp all over logo prints) #4- definitely gonna be utilizing this moniker. #8- glad I'm not the only a$$hole who thinks ppl who take up more than one seat should not be allowed to sit down. #9- you have no idea, this is all brothers rock in philly!

"Come Follow Me Into The Matrix"