In a rush to attend some oddly random gallery opening I often frequent, I made the fatal decision to share a taxi w/ some shabbily dressed looking guy who was headed to the same general area I was going to. Not being one for idle chatter, I introduced myself anyway, as did he (I think I remember him saying his name was ummm, "David" or a "Bruce"...or something close to that).
Anyway, he noticed the cabbie's last name was "Banner" and laughed about them being distant cousins. Me being nosey peeped that he was carrying one of those trendy "I Am Not A Plastic Bag" bags with a couple of plastic bottles of water in it. "Goin' green huh?" I inquired. Boy did he snap, "Green? NO! Where? You wouldn't like me if I went green!" I caught and attitude like "Huh? What? You serious?" Then he got all of a sudden all brolic and said in a much deep voice "I SAID, you won't like me if I go GREEN!" Dizzam!!! Dude started gettting all green in the face, the arms, f**k it all OVER! Then he jumped out the cab, all big and s#!t, like he took a gang of steroids in one gulp! And ripped the cab like it was a damn soda tab! The black man in me was like "You heard what the F**K I said, ya green ass Barry Bonds!" But the "bitchassness" in me spoke and said "Don't worry, I'll cover your half of the ride!" The moral of the story boys & girls is "Don't share no cabs with some crazy, steroid taking white dudes name Banner!"