"He Said / She Said!" -Battle Of The sEXes (Pt.1)

No matter how LONG man has been around, the opposite sex will always be a source of fascination for us. We're always one step away from breaking the mysterious scientific code of how the female (or male) brain works. But till then we're left in the dark always wondering just WHY they do what they do. Anyways recently I posed this Q&A with some guy friends of mine to get a better perspective on the "State of (Love ) Affairs" between the two sexes purely for s#1ts & giggles, & to hear the travesty that goes on out on "the field" that we assume only happens to us, but is surprisingly universal. I asked the gathered group to fill in the blanks to "I once dated a chick that..." and end it with "And she had the nerve to..." and got some rather hilarious comments back, that I'm sure you'll enjoy and share amongst friends & family alike. READ ON!

"I once dated a chick that..."
Wore weave, a heavily padded panties, colored contacts, press on nails,
and got her breast enlarged
And she had the nerve to...
say "Where all the REAL ni99as at?"

"I once dated a chick that...
Had FOUR kids by SIX different baby fathers
"And she had the nerve to..."
Call ME irresponsible!

"I once dated a chick that..."
NEVER paid for dates, dinner, drinks, movies, trips away...nothing!
"And she had the nerve to..."
Ask me while riding in her car "How come you never pay for gas?"

"I once dated a chick that..."
NEVER flushed after herself
"And she had the nerve to..."
Say I wasn't about s#@t , and how come I stay pissing her off!

"I once dated a chick that..."
Had INTENSE multiple orgasms EVERY TIME we had sex
"And she had the nerve to..."
Say I wasn't a dependable guy, she can't count on me (?)

"I once dated a chick that..."
Always sent me lovingly texts, e-mails, we Skyped on a daily basis, Facebook poked each other, and followed each other on Twitter!
"And she had the nerve to..."
Say when we broke up that we didn't know how to communicate!

"I once dated a chick that..."
Forgot we even dated!
"And she had the nerve to..."
Pass off a phony "cell phone" number which happened to be the same as MY home phone #!

"I once dated a chick that..."
Was so dumb she swore a "pothole" was when you burned a hole by mistake through your clothes while smoking weed!
"And she had the nerve to..."
Say "DUH!" after she said it.

"I once dated a chick that..."
Argued me down that Fab's "Throw it in the bag" song is about condoms & safe sex!
"And she had the nerve to..."
Admit to me that he came up with the title when she meet him back stage!

"I once dated a chick that..."
I found out for a fact that she slept with FOUR guys at the SAME time!
"And she had the nerve to..."
Tell me "Oh, I hate having to take the TRAIN!"

WILD right! Well ladies it's YOU'RE turn. I wanna hear your feedback, just to make things fair! I promise I'll post the good ones too, so stay tuned!