Friday, January 2, 2009

"And The Envelope Please...." - the Minority Players That Were Major In '08

Okay, now back to our scheduled program...If you're just now joining our show, this is Pt.2 of the first annual Minority Report On-line Awards. So far we've given out 9 awards in total, so before we go to commerical here are nine more.

"Favorite Celebrity Sighting /Crashed Party" -Andre 3000, Benjamin Bixby launch Barney's

Even though I had known about event months in advance (thanks Misako) there was no sure fire way I was geting in...specially when I never received a confirmed RSVP (don't you hate that?) But I had this "I'm meant to be there attitude" and decided to still show up! But what made my chances even slimmer was I was with my boy Chef (Lowe) who I invited to tag along for the ride. So first, we go up some back elevator to get to the floor the function is on (cool we're in the building at least). Then once we reach the floor, the keepers of the gate, IE the list girls "red flag" us (we black folk) but I dip off like somebody was calling my government. But Chef gets caught in the "Who's list are you on?" convo...Damn! Some paparazzi photog from Men's Vogue pulled me aside to snap my outfit, and I guess "the list girls" figured I belonged up in there. Chef pointed like,"I'm with him" and he was free to roam too. LOL. Anyways while strolling about, making full use of their open cocktail bar, Dre 3 triple O did a double take at my get-up like, "Wait, is he wearing my $#!t?" Nah bra, what I got on is vintage, straight from the House of Minority (lmao). Benjamin Bixby ain't there yet.

"Favorite Japanese Person to Meet Other Japanese"
-Misako O.

No one else was in the running for this category, but she would win hands down anyway! Besides being the only other person I know that shops more than me, she also has become a rising star up at the trendiest new brand Rag and Bone. You can blame her, for some of the sample sale info you've seen from time to time post on here. But honestly, I think she's some Brooklyn/Japanese ambassador on the low. Through her, I met a "city" worth of Japanese folks w/out ever stepping on one plane! So if you ever run into me on the streets and I'm looking like some "black tour guide of the ghetto", NOPE! It's just me hanging with 'Sako and the gang. Don't be afraid to stop and say hi...or rather "konichiwa bitches!" REALLY loud.

"Favorite Celebrate to Stare At From Across A Room" -Cassie

Oh you thought I meant "local" celebrity Ashley right? Sorry, it's the one on the left this award goes to. "Sort of a singer" Cassie my friends is NOT "drop dead," however in person she's no "paper bagger" either. LOL. Now I'm NO "star gazer" what so ever, but DAMN! Even if she was not who she is, she'd still get mad Franc, Yen, and Euro outta dudes. Smell me? Diddy was not far behind with mad bodyguards on this night, but I think she needed them more than he did. She's definitely an "Official Girl" in my book. FYI Ash had no idea who she was while taking this flick, I was like "Oh ummm, she's that Sean John model"

"Favorite Body You Wish Was Your Girls Body" -???

Now come on...If you've stared at this picture as long as I have, you can see why she won by a land (air & sea) slide. Never quite got her name, but for the sole purpose of this posting we'll just call her "Dream Luv'r" for now (hehehehe). Cause If I didn't take this pic, I would've swore I dreamt it. Now If you happen to known this young lady, please tell her the Minority Report has an award for her. That only she can pick up PERSONALLY! That's one, and two, pick up my calls sometimes, I won't waste your minutes...
promise. And third "Sorry, I'm not really a rapper btw. And I'll pay for the cab next go round, my bad. My wallet was in my OTHER pants."

"Favorite Person To Compare Your Social Life To" -Keino B.

carpet events, runway shows, listening parties, baby showers and bar mitzvahs you name it, I ran into this well dressed guy! I used to think "Damn, I sure do go out alot!" till I met this dude! I would LOVE to see his iCal schedule for this year alone. Lmao. Good thing Keino doesn't have a camera, and a blog to go with it boy. I'd be outta work, standing on the unemployment line RIGHT behind you. When you go out and happen to see him you'll be like "Okay, I RSVP'd to the right events" Go out and you happen to see him TOO much, then ummm he's stalking you... Straight up! Duck somewhere ni66a! Hide!

"Favorite Point To The Other Guy In The Picture Picture" -Print & Theophilus London

Taken backstage at an LIU concert, I didn't think this one was gonna even come out as good as it did. Well you KNOW how hard it is to get rappers these days to smile on camera right? And I'm kinda tired of folks throwing up "the peace sign" too. So to get them to even do some what of a pose I asked, "Who blew up the bathroom, with that awful smelling S-bomb?" So that's why you see "the pointing" folks.

"Favorite Band To See Live Twice" -Budos Band

If you you've never heard of them don't feel so bad, I just "discovered" them myself earlier this year and got hooked! While attending some function
Ashley put me on to for Wax Poetics magazine, the crew from Sallomazing!'s B'day party all headed to the Red Bull Space. They were the PERFECT band for the gig, cause they definitely performed like they just went through a case of the "Bull!" They're some of the funkiest white boys you'll ever hear, and that's no comment on their body odor. I was even more amazed when I caught them over at BAM about a month ago. The line was SICK! Trust me you need some "Budos" in your life.

"Favorite Person To Give A Fake Time To" -Lyshann "L.A." Hall

Forget the Notorious B.I.G. this guy here is "Notorious-ly L.A.T.E!" LOL. If he says he's gonna be somewhere, trust that he'll make the effort. However the TIME he'll arrive...a whole 'nother ball game folks. I'm convinced the "L.A." nickname came from him being 3hrs behind East coast time. When Fall comes, he NEVER has to set his expensive watches he wears back, cause he's already a hour behind! So folks if you plan to close some multi-million dollar deal, and you need him to sit in on the meeting, remember to tell him not only a WEEK in advance, also 2 hrs before the REAL time the meeting starts!

"Favorite Party Starters"- Three Way Tie

If you EVER "luck up" and meet any of these crews at a happening function, you're guaranteed a couple of things. You either getting back home at some un-Godly hour of the morning, drunk off some drink you never heard of, dudes trying to befriend you to meet them, AND your feet hurting from dancing all night! If it's everything listed, then that was GOOD night my friend! As soon as I get the word that I'm hanging with any of these group of ladies, I know I'm not seeing work the next day
...maybe not even my crib (serious lol)!

Okay, that's all for now till Monday. Tune back in to see if YOU'RE up for an award!


BUTCH DIVA said...

ha! i know the girl with the dream body - been there done that butch diva style!!!! hahahahaha. Oh and her name is Nazia for your records!

FLY LADY DI said...

love this post it's maaaaaadddd funny AL!

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