"It's Crunch Time!" -Cereal Killa!

One bright early Saturday morning I decided to start my new day with a healthy bowl of (one of) my favorite cereals which is Capt. Crunch (w/ the berries...of course). Curiosity had struck me while examining the box and I wondered to myself "Of WHAT navy or ship WAS he a captain of exactly?" I love knowing random useless trivia so this was right up my alley (speaking of "alley" here's a quick plug: "Rock & Bowl" -May 9th @ Brooklyn Bowl! FREE!) Went to the ol' reliable Internet, that's when a part of my childhood died! What I uncovered was (now prepare yourself for the shocker) that the good ol' Crunch. here was the captain of a SLAVE ship! Jaw dropper right! Dude had retired from the British navy and to make ends meet he became the captain of a vessel hustling Africans to the Americas dude! No s#%t man! Crunch ISN'T even his mother f**king last name yo! I was reading that "Crunch" was just a nick-name his fellow ship-mates (seamen, or whatever you call those guys that sailed with him) gave him the name after he whipped up some weird "crunchy" meal to feed the slaves on their journey west. WORD! And get this, to add flavor he threw in some "berries" from their native lands to make his "crunch" meal more edible...WOW! I dropped not only my jaw but my SPOON too, while reading this reveling info. I can NEVER look into his blue eyes and at that hipster of a moustache the same EVER again dawg! Do you KNOW what this MEANS man? Let me spell it out for you "Capt. Crunch cereal is really SLAVE chow being consumed by the innocent babies of the world!" What's next Toucan Sam of Froot Loops is the first openly GAY cartoon character rocking that rainbow beak of his, with that soft whispery voice telling kids "Follow your nose" huh? On another note, Why is Crunch's eyebrows on TOP of his hat? Well now you know the facts kids, so stick with the Tiger (Tony NOT Woods)! LOL. Don't "Crunch-a-tize" man! I'll pass on that one!

"It's All Thurgood In the Hood"-Fishburne On B'way

Hey, great actor Laurence Fishburne (Tony winner & Oscar nom), would like for me to inform you good folks that read the Minority Report that one, he has taken full claim to all the illegitimate African children he's fathered. And two, he's currently starring in the staged biographical story of Thurgood Marshall. Who is that you say?
Why Mr. Marshall was the grandson of a slave who later became our first Supreme Court Justice of African-American descent. However this is not a black race story, it is a human race story. That is very relatible to our times now. It will be playing for a short time at the Booth Theater, so support the arts. And refrain from yelling out "Morpheus!!!" in the audience PLEASE! That joke is old now.

Laurence Fishburne plays
THURGOOD
Booth Theatre
222 West 45th Street (Betwn B'way and 8th)

Upcoming week's performances

Tue.Apr.22	8:00PM
Wed.Apr.23	2:00PM
Wed.Apr.23	8:00PM
Thu.Apr.24	8:00PM
Fri.Apr.25	8:00PM
Sat.Apr.26	2:00PM
Sat.Apr.26	8:00PM
Sun.Apr.27	3:00PM

"Hell's Kitchen"-Colonel Sanders Chickens Out

It has recently come to attention of the Minority Report that the beloved founder and iconic figurehead of KFC, was discovered to be a former
slave owner at one time. Yes, spicy and mild "dark meat" indeed.
While residing in Kentucky for over 85 yrs. it was said that he owned up to 13 some odd slaves (I'm guessing one for each herb and spice in his secret recipe) on his sprawling plantation and large chicken farm, said to be the biggest in the region at that time. However what's even more surprising about this revelation it that two of his closest
"house servants" were none other than the real-life advertising mascots "Uncle Ben" and "Aunt Jemima!"
Deep like fish grease, right!?!
Descendants of the Ben and Jemima, have publicly made claims that the good Colonel stole & sold their family's cookbook to industry giants for undisclosed millions, and are now seeking to sue the greedy
chicken corporation.
*Side note: Man, can you just imagine meals at that house?
Early morning breakfast with "Auntie" cooking up her now famous flapjacks topped with her warm homemade syrup, then BAM, dinner comes and you've got the Colonels 3 course cuisine
(Biscuit, mash w/gravy, and spicy chicken) and "Uncle's" rice
staring up from the plate at you. Damn, I just made myself hungry.
As this story further unfolds like a dinner napkin, I'll keep you
"a breast" of things...or at least a thigh. (Lol)

"Walker This Way!" -Kara Walker exhibit @ The Whitney

TODAY people!

Not tomorrow, not the day after, but today will be the absolute last day that the Whitney Museum will be showing the thought provoking and often controversial works of artist Kara Walker. Sadly her 5 month run entitled "My Enemy, My Oppressor, My Love," closes to the public and moves on to another great city. For those unfamiliar with her works, Ms. Walker's works are often huge crisp black on sharp white background silhouettes depicting scenes from the old South during the times of Slavery.
The images are poetic without words, and bold without ever speaking. Please, I advise that you do some artistic investing and embrace these works while the artist is still living.

The Whitney Museum of American Art.

945 Madison Ave. @ 75th St.
New York, New York