"Two Angry Birds Tweeting In A Tree!" -On-Line Beefing, But It's All Gravy!

Rarely am I ever on Twitter much. But usually when I do get on it, it's to post links to my blog (yeah the one you're reading as we speak) that day, or to shout out my crew's (@theBlockAssoc) movements event wise. However I been hearing lately about the latest celebrity trend of "beefing" via Twitter. So I thought, "Hey why do the celebs get to have ALL the fun? I'm a pretty witty guy, let me make my tweets more engaging than just party posting!" So I made a slick remark aimed at @Jourdainracing and before you know it #FakeTwitterBeefFridays was born! If you missed it, here's a recap of our "heated" exchange of words that won us new followers by the end of it all. Tell the kids to leave the room if you're reading this aloud. It gets pretty RACY! If we've offended anyone...F**k Yo Couch!

S/O to @jourdainracing for landing that head designer job at Steve Harvey's suits for men! Hope the money's worth it!

S/O @theMReporter for getting job at Disney World as Jimmy the Critcket

@jourdainracing Bwahahahaha! Curious would you have to wear one of his suits to WORK? #JustaskinbutREALLYjustnosey

@jourdainracing Tyler Perry's looking for a stunt double, said you can do ALL of his head to crotch scenes #PAUSE I'll fwd ur email to him!

@theMReporter Tyler Perry sent that shit to you. Eddie Kane said he needs his body back.

@jourdainracing Tyson Beckford is suing you for identity theft!

Spike Lee looking for @theMReporter has the perfect roll to play as Sammy Davis Jr.

@jourdainracing is the ONLY dude I know that looks like Nicki Minaj from the waist down!

@jourdainracing You and MC Hammer have a joint bank account...BROKE!

Planters Peanuts is looking hire you @theMReporter as the mascot!

@jourdainracing Mascot for Planters? Chew these NUTS!

@theMReporter I see you still waiting on settlement check from Bishop Eddie Long

@jourdainracing you and Johnny Gill share the same DNA & Eddie Murphy's guest house! Welcome to #FakeTwitterbeefFridays!

I heard @theMReporter was a fluffer on the True Blood set for Lafayettye #FakeTwitterbeefFridays!

@jourdainracing read in your diary that you slept w/ both Bert AND Ernie! #thatshitcray

Morgan "@theMReporter Freeman" just did a cameo in "The Help" with Miss Daisy.

@jourdainracing Twitter e-mailed and said Rupaul & Elton John are now Following YOU! #FakeTwitterbeefFridays!

@theMReporter: Steve Urkel wants his glasses and suspenders back #FakeTwitterbeefFridays!

@jourdainracing shows up to a topless bar w/o a f**kin' shirt! Who does that? DUH!!! #FakeTwitterbeefFridays!

@theMReporter did an job as crpt keeper no makeup required

@jourdainracing has a "tramp stamp" that says "Drop like it's hot" w/ an arrow pointing down!

@theMReporter I heard you're a regular DJ @ the Pink Flamingo

@jourdainracing Oscar the Grouch said stop leaving your f**kin' condoms in his CAN! It's SESAME St. NOT BEAT St. #FakeTwitterbeefFridays!

@theMReporter: 1st man to star in a bukaki #FakeTwitterBeefFridays!

@jourdainracing believed "PINKY" was a virgin and STILL ate her out! #FakeTwitterbeefFridays!

@jourdainracing sips on fine "vintage" cough syrup w/ Lil' Wayne while braiding his hair!

@theMReporter still getting your checks from New Jack City Pooky?

@jourdainracing got "jumped in" by Fat Albert's Gang! What up blood/cuz! #FakeTwitterBeefFridays!

Why @theMReporter went to @GrinStylez and got a tattoo on his throat that says "NO GAGE FLEX" #FakeTwitterBeefFridays!

@jourdainracing looks like he's listening to Rebecca Black's song "Friday" in his avatar! #FakeTwitterBeefFridays!

@theMReporter looks like the last hot dog left on the bbq grill #FakeTwitterBeefFridays!

@jourdainracing looks up to Prince...on his knees! #FakeTwitterBeefFridays!

@theMReporter looks up to Shaq's nuts standing up #FakeTwitterBeefFridays!

@jourdainracing got a penis transplant donation from Gary Coleman #FakeTwitterBeefFridays!

@jourdainracing brings his own "taco meat" to cookouts! #FakeTwitterBeefFridays!

@jourdainracing recorded a remix of "Chocolate Rain" using auto-tune! #FakeTwitterBeefFridays!

@jourdainracing got a hard on whenever he saw Jordan's tongue hanging out! #FakeTwitterBeefFridays!

@jourdainracing was breast feed (powered milk) up until yesterday! #FakeTwitterBeefFridays!

@jourdainracing beat out the lead chimp for the sequel to the Rise Of The Apes! The shit is bananas! B-A-NA-NA-S! #FakeTwitterBeefFridays!

@theMReporter ( -̩̩̩͡˛ -̩̩̩͡ ) dude got to go back to work. Your killing me over here.

@jourdainracing Overtime at work THANKS to you! #Dunzo! That concludes #FakeTwitterBeefFridays! folks thanks for watching @TheBlockAssoc

So folks you read the play by play back and forth tweets, Who do you think won the first edition of #FakeTwitterBeefFridays? Follow or lead w/ @theMreporter & @Jourdainracing

Now WHO want fake beef next?

"Thought I'd Remind Ya!"-Watch The Throne Album Review, H.A.M Sandwich!

I decided I'll review the album from a different per-
spective this time around track for track with my favorite line(s) that are winners. Why? Cause quite frankly the $#it is DOPE! So if you was looking for a co-sign...GO COP IT! BONG! Review done. So now can I move on to the lyrics cause honestly this is what were here for huh? Right? Have a seat, put the kids to sleep and let's commence the review shall we?

"OTIS" -Safe to say this is the song of the summer ! Sorry Drake ("I'm On One"). When you hear the whole album in it's entirety
you'll completely understand why this made it as the first single. My favorite lines: Jay-Z - "...Looking like wealth, I'm about to call the paparazzi on myself..." Kanye-"I wrote Jesus Walks I'm never going to Hell.." or "...Sophisticated ignorance I write my curses in cursive..."

"GOTTA HAVE IT" -Hypnotic track that I just couldn't get past! TOO SHORT if you ask me, and I'm not talking bout the rapper either! How can you hate on a track where Kanye shouts out Nostrand Ave? Jay-Z & Kanye - "Ni**gas hate ballers these days, ain't that like LeBron James? Ain't that just like D-Wade?" and "I wish I could give you the feeling, I'm planking on a million..."

"ILLEST MOTHERF**KER ALIVE!" - A corny line like "...Staples in my dick cause I f**k so many centerfolds" only Kanye could make that work. Even HE laughs at the end of that line! "F**k your awards like Eddie Murphy's couch!" is Jay-Z's input I'm digging on this one.

"LIFT OFF!" -Not much rapping on this one so the winner by default is "Earth is boring too, $#it is making my dick soft" from Jay-Z LOVE the track ending after the countdown!

"MADE IN AMERICA" - 'Ye spits -"This ain't no fashion show, we LIVE it!' & "I'm rapping on them beats they was suppose to buy. I guess I'm getting high on my own supply" and Jay-Z retorts back "Our apple pie was supplied by Arm & Hammer..." and "No papa, Bad Santa, the streets raised me pardon my bad manners..." rounds out the few lines I like on this one.

"Murder To Excellence" - Jay -Z goes -"I'm giving you respect you I expect the same thing..." plus "I'm out here celebrating my post demise" & Kanye says- "Shop class, EVERYONE got a tool" & "Time for us to redefine Black Power. 41 black souls killed in an hour." is his contribution to the "Murder" half of this song. On "Excellence" Jay goes in saying "No cheap colonge, whenever I shhhttt shhhhttt, success never smell so sweet!" "Domino! Domino! Only SPOT a few blacks the higher I go.." DOPE! Mr. West comes back with "When you picture events called black ties, what's the last thing you expect to see? Black guys!" NICE!

"NEW DAY!" - This track sounds real Dilla-ish to me for some reason. Kanye spits a zinger stab at Amber Rose with lines like "...And I never ever let 'em hit a strip club, I learn the hard way that's not a place to find love" Jay-Z tells his future seeds "Sorry junior, I already ruined ya, you ain't even alive paparazzi pursuing ya.." Deep ish fellas!

"NI**AS IN PARIS" - LOVE the sample line "I don't know WHAT that even means! No one knows what it means, but it's provocative?" But the winner her lyrically are Jay's line "If you escaped like I escape you'd be in Paris getting f**ked up too!" 'Ye replies "Bougie girl grab her hand, F**K the bitch she don't wanna dance. Excuse my French but I'm in France!"

"NO CHURCH IN THE WILD!" -I need a remix w/ just Frank Ocean on this one! Fa real! But "Think about the girl in all leopard, who was rubbing the wood Kiki Shepard!" And "We formed a NEW religion no sins if there's permission..." Kanye says convincingly!

"PRIMETIME" -Lines like "NEW money I found the fountain of youth!" "DAMN Yeezy why they all gotta be dimes? Adam gave up a rib, so mine better be prime!" are arrogance at its BEST!

"WHO GON STOP ME?" -"You heard Yezzy was racist? Will I guess it's somewhat basis, I only like green faces...", "I went through Hell I'm expecting Heaven!" are sure to be SOMEBODY'S Facebook status soon I see it now!

"WHY I LOVE YOU" - Jay-Z goes H.A.M w/ "F**K you squares that why the circle got smaller!", "I'm I my brother's keeper? As long as a ni**ga don't creep up!" "Me or the money, what are you loyal to?" are the stand outs on this track. But it honestly fire all the ways through.

Too bad Soul Train is no longer on I would've LOVED to see these two on Sat morning w/ Don C. performing these tracks "live"

"I'm Just Sayin' Man!" -Shared Thoughts & What Nots From The Mind Of The Minority

NEVER even knew this was on the market! But is this the "Hood Milk" that all these young chicks are getting thick from?

To Revitalizing their careers, Eddie Murphy should have been cast in that "Shrek Musical", I swore Chris Rock would be in "Madagascar LIVE!" and Lauryn Hill AND Whoopi Goldberg in that "Sister Act" joint on Broadway! Right?

Question, if you're biracial in a bi-coastal, bi-curious relationship does that mean you're really "Tri-Bi" or "Bi to the 3 power" "3x Bi"?







Come on you were wondering these things too! Talk amongst yourselves and get back to me when you got it all worked out...LOL.

"Acting Like An Ass" -Shrek Hits Broadway!

If I ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, in my lifetime (or my next one for that matter) "miraculously" become some actor who's down at bottom of the career barrel. Looking for meaty roles, to see my name in lights. I give you FULL permission, NO questions asked, all rights to give me a swift kick the back of my head, if I even THINK about playing this part (and myself in the process)! I'll take an educated guess that he's performing the character of "Donkey." in the musical from the Shrek series. And boy, did they make him look like one. Lol. Let's just hope that he doesn't take Eddie Murphy role too serious and start picking up "Trannies" during his nightly car cruising. I can just hear the reviews now saying "He's such a bad ass!"